So I’m linking up today with Amanda for Thinking Out Loud Thursday.
I subscribe to Runner’s World magazine and finally sat to read it last week before my half marathon. I flipped right to “No Pity: It Takes a Lot of Courage to Run a Sucky Race,” by Lauren Fleshman. (I guess I thought that my upcoming half may be sucky…)
The title drew me in and I love Lauren Fleshman. I began to read Lauren’s article and proceeded to get teary-eyed.
She described pushing through doubt, facing failure head on in the wake of big goals, and embracing how important it is to try anyway during the Olympic Trials in 2012. The article led me to think about on my own personal courage.
I haven’t been feeling the “running” lately. I have skipped weekday runs. The ones I have done have been filled with walking and a pace of over 12 minutes. My longs runs since April have been non-existent other than the VCM relay. (That one was unplanned and so my goal was just to have fun.)
I doubted my ability to run another half marathon well. Yes, I could finish it. But I was embarrassed to just finish again. I am not injured and I have finished a half marathon this year in 2:09. So why attempt one when I knew the results in advance. I did not train well enough to do well. Should I still try?
On the fear of failing in a very public way and feeling sorry for herself well in advance of any failure, Lauren wrote:
“I would think, This is the very thing that holds people back from trying things. From having experiences. This fear that failing makes you a failure. In our core, we want to believe that trying matters, regardless of the outcome. That having the courage to see things through to their mysterious ends is worthwhile. That fighting well with what you have is enough.”
I realized after reading this article, that my race was more than just a finish time. It was an experience. Running 13.1 miles. Meeting new people. Seeing new places. Challenging myself.
If I didn’t try, I would miss all this.
So I ran the Walkway Half Marathon and gave it my best shot. And I didn’t have a PR. My time was even slower than my last half marathon (that I just ran for fun.) But that was okay and expected.
Trying is enough. Seeing things through to that mysterious end is worth it. Fighting with what I have is enough.
“…the reason we set big goals is not to achieve them, but to set ourselves on a road trip toward them, and that trip is where all the good loving is.”
Happy Running! Do you agree? Did you get a chance to read the article?